Cree-py Guys (clap clap)... They're stalking you (clap clap)...

That was to the tune of Hall & Oates' "Private Eyes" in case you didn't get that.

Anyway, this story isn’t really blog-worthy but it’s time for my weekly blog post so here you go.

The other day, ‘manofchase’ sent me the following message around 3:30 or so in the afternoon:

how are you doing ?I would like too meet you .lets talk ..

I didn’t respond because I had zero (0) interest. But then, at approximately 1:51 in the morning he follows up with:

how are you beautiful ?nice pictures with a great smile .I would like too meet you if that's okay with you lets talk my name is Sean..hope I hear from you soon ..

Naturally, I didn’t respond because of the aforementioned zero interest. Oh, and because I was fucking asleep. But, not to not be a ‘man of chase’, he sent me another message at 1 muther fuckin’ 54 in the morning:

I must say I love your dimples .share them with me..its a new year so let's get started .. ;-)

However, because I was bored at work when I read these follow-ups, I did take the time to respond by saying :

Really? 3 messages? Tip: Send one and then wait to hear back.

His response:

well hello how are you doing?my name is Sean .and I would like too take the time out and speak with you.if that's fine with you.

That really made me chuckle out loud. But not in the good way. What a creep. But not in the good way. First, if you sent someone a message and they looked at your profile and didn’t respond, there’s an 80% chance they’re not interested. So leave it alone. I suppose that’s why he calls himself man of chase though. I’d like to switch that up to 'man of wtf'? Or 'man of several restraining orders'. But I won’t be offering up those suggestions. I think I’ve said too much already. And this is totally not the first time that somebody has sent me multiple messages even though I didn’t express any interest or respond to their e-mails, winks, pokes, nudges, boinks, etc. It know it shouldn’t, but sometimes it astounds me how stupid and weird some guys are. And I realize I need to expand my horizons beyond these dating sites but the social scene in the winter of Milwaukee isn't that awesome. So, until the weather warms up or something interesting happens, I'm going to continue to share stories of the petri dish that is online dating.

So... wanna look at some pictures?

Here’s a guy who, not only does he not have any friends and go to any social engagements where picture taking was present, but he also clearly doesn’t even have a camera phone and/or bathroom mirror. Thus, scanning in his drivers license. And this was the *only* picture on his dating profile. And according to his profile he lives in Wisconsin now. At least get an updated license so we can see what you look like now, guy!

Here's a dirty guy with an even dirtier baby. I don't get why he thinks this would appeal to any woman. I'll keep this guy in mind though if there's ever a revival of Deliverance that I've got my heart set on going to.

Now this... this is a guy after my own heart. He loooves eating pie. I would block his eyes out but since he so proudly posted this article with his name attached, there's really no point. However, it's really not a good idea to put your name out in the public like this. Especially when some people have boring jobs and a lot of spare time.

Maybe not the most riveting blog post but a post nevertheless. Enjoy it or don't. The choice is yours. (But if you don't like it, I'll die a little on the inside.)